The other day I was sitting in my living room, looking out
the window, listening to an audio book and spinning. All-in-all, not a bad
life. But it suddenly struck me that it was the second week of March and I had
yet to have my hitchhiking dream. For the last decade and a half I have usually
had, in mid February, a dream about hitching across Canada. The dreams are
vibrant, full of adventure and colour. These dreams always leave me with a
sense of euphoria that last for hours after getting up. They have been my antidote
to the long winters of central Ontario - my medicine to alleviate cabin fever .
This year nothing. No dreams, no fantasies about rides, nary a thought about
anything to do with hitchhiking. It was a disturbing thought. Did it mean that
that part of my life is finished - would I never hitchhike again? As I thought
about my dreams or the lack thereof, I wondered what had changed. There are a
couple of things:
Up to last year, I lived in Ontario. Part of the dream was
spending at least part of the summer on the west coast. It sounded romantic and
certainly the people I spoke to were at least secretly envious. It felt like it
was an adventure. This year my plans are rather simple. In Mid May, I am flying
to Sudbury and a month later I will hitchhike at least two thirds of the way
back west. But going to visit family in Sudbury is not nearly as cool sounding
as "spending the summer on the west coast". When I tell people now
about my plans, some of them even grimace and look as if they want to say that
they are sorry that I have to leave. There is no doubt that many of the folks
who live on Vancouver Island are snobs about where they live. None are
supportive about leaving for any length of time.
Another reason may be that last year I hitchhiked a fair
amount around the island. Specifically throughout the fall and in the spring I
would hitch to Croften, hop on the ferry to Salt Spring Island and then hitch
to my friend's house near Fulford. That friend passed last fall and so I have
nowhere to hitch to. Maybe I am just out of practice thinking about travelling
on the kindness of others.
There is the possibility that I am getting old. That the
thought of spending five or more days standing and occasionally sleeping on the
side of the road holds less appeal than it is use to. While this is more than
possible, it is a reality that I chose not to consider.
I might be bored with the whole thing. I have made a lot of
trips, they have generally been fun but certainly it is less of an adventure
than it use to be. Certainly in the past
year of so I have thought a lot more about how heavy the pack is and how high the
hills are than I use to do.
It has also, as everyone knows, been even greyer on the west
coast than normal. It rained all fall (October was the wettest month in decades,
November was almost as wet), and it has
been cooler and more snow has fallen
(and accumulated) than in at least ten years .I am reasonably sure that I would
not use up all of my toes and fingers counting the number of sunny days since
the fall. I think almost all of my first dreams of the year about hitchhiking
have occurred during that marvellous time some refer to as the February thaw.
That time, when for a few days, people who have been bundled up get to relax
their shoulders hunched up about their ears, unzip their winter coats and to
fantasize about the possibility that winter, this year, might not last until
May. There is no February thaw on the island. Things barely freeze. While a lot
of snow (it is all relative) did fall,
most of it was gone in a few days. There is no sense of elation about maybe
surviving another winter - no celebration of the spirit staying sane for another year. There is
no euphoria. Perhaps I didn't have the
"dream" for the simple reason that my brain was just waiting for the
right cue from the weather.
P.S. yesterday was a lovely day, I worked in the garden for
a bit and last night I had the dream. It was interesting in that I was hitching
with a group of friends and we were doing it in a part of Canada that still had
huge snow banks! I wonder what that means?